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Men In Love

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While there are some fascinating chapters to this book, for example the parts that cover straight men who have fantasies about sex with men, and the part on bisexuality, the author's chapter on homosexuality is really "off". Love and sex are two different things, as long as you keep that in mind as well as an open mind this book is pretty damned good! Nancy Friday, better known for her writings on female sexual fantasies, turns her attention to the opposite sex in Men in Love. Now you'd think that being an erotic author, I'd know this and mainly I do, but this book still came as a revelation. The "ick" factor is high, and while I consider myself to be fairly open-minded, there are some really deviant, distasteful and downright disturbing fantasies in this book.

One always wonders if the letters printed were selected to fit her theory, or the latter arose to describe the data. They were less like "I will take my pleasure on this woman whether she likes it or not, disgusting weak woman, I am so superior, fear my power" and more like "I will force this woman to agree to have sex with me, and I will force her to like it, because she is too inhibited to be able to say Yes to what she wants and to know what she will like. To calculate the overall star rating and percentage breakdown by star, we don’t use a simple average. Rather than merely an unfiltered compilation of letters detailing male sexual fantasies, Friday synthesizes them around a given theme--say, oral sex or sadomasochism--into an explanation of how they arise and what they signify.My conclusion is, if you are sensitive and of course a woman and can be slightly envious then just LEAVE this book alone and go for Nancy Friday's "My Secret Garden" instead or "Forbidden Flowers" which is more about women's fantasies, then maybe you'll be more prepared and can move on to Men in love. She gave them a legitimate arena where they could share their "secret gardens" -- the hidden and forbidden but nonetheless real and true. If you are a reader that is easily put off by vivid descriptions of sexual acts and if issues like Oedipus complex unsettle you, then I would not advise it. I laughed out loud when she said that women are repulsed by M/M, because (she says) a woman is threatened by the idea that a man could want to be with another man rather than with her. Though the author's explanations give the impression of being presumptuous at certain points, nancy tried to be objective in most cases and the book in overall is very riveting.

You can change your choices at any time by visiting Cookie preferences, as described in the Cookie notice. No man in this book says, "My wife likes this, so I often fantasize about it because I love how much pleasure it brings her," while very many men say, "I wish my wife would like this" or "I wish my wife would do this.

Most of the fantasies were between vaguely and actively repulsive to me to read, and they were all so. Child psychiatrists now think sex is not so much slumbering as it has learned to hide itself more successfully from mother’s anxious eyes. Friday said she got very few rape fantasies among her submissions, though I think her definition of what constitutes a rape fantasy may be significantly narrower than mine because she said she got only 3, and I counted several more than that in the book. In our society, female exhibitionism is a form of seduction, but male exhibitionism is a hostile act. Her view is that homosexuality is the result of a boy denying to himself that he wants to have sex with his mother, either out of shame or because his mother is "pure," and also fearing being harmed (especially castrated) by his father, an impossible rival, for wanting to have sex with his mother.

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